The Politically Correct/Easily Offended Epidemic

Okay, so I don't think the majority of people, myself included, really try to offend others. Me personally, I don't enjoy arguments or contention. I'd rather avoid them altogether.

However, it is physically impossible to go through this life without offending someone unless you literally don't say or do anything but even then there's no guarantee because really awful, douchey jerks can say that they're offended by your existence.

Anyway, it's really becoming an issue for me and I honestly think there needs to be more people talking about how our culture and this generation is using the term "politically correct" or "tolerance" as substitute words for "easily offended."

Seriously, this country's first amendment guarantees the right to free speech and freedom of religion. Yet, somehow that's only applicable unless you don't offend anyone with your opinions, thoughts, or beliefs?

I'm not referring to freedom of participating and promoting incredibly degrading and obviously offensive things like pornography and slander. Because to be honest, pornography is offensive and everyone should be offended by it. But that's not what I'm talking about. (Yet ironically people are more offended by very innocent comments MUCH MORE than pornography. Oh the hypocrisy. Also, by the way, pornography isn't just nudey pictures of people. I don't think the Sistine Chapel is pornographic. 50 Shades of Grey on the other hand, is.)

I'm talking about the fact that people get offended by some of the stupidest things I've ever heard and are constantly judging and criticizing things others say. If I were to say something along the lines of "Motherhood is the most revered and honored calling a woman will ever have," or "no one can replace the role of a mother" I will suddenly get a long list of hate comments from trollers saying I'm "anti-feminist" or something along those lines.

If I say something about how amazing husbands and fathers are, and how important their contribution to society is, I'm suddenly reviled as being a "patriarchal misogynistic."

If I say something patriotic about how wonderful the United States of America is and how my father, grandfathers and great-grandfathers fought for this country, I'm suddenly "xenophobic" and an "ultranationalist."

Man, so much for freedom of speech, am I right?

I'm just so freaking sick of this garbage. Anyone who is looking to be offended by someone or something will find a way to be offended.

And no amount of tip-toeing, mamby pamby, "there there," walking-on-eggshells-while-we-try-to-find-another-way-of-saying-something is going to stop these types of people from getting offended. Period. End of story.

I think we, as a society, have taken ourselves far too seriously. However, I am certainly not promoting vicious attacks and comments directed at any sort of group of people based on race, religion, sexual orientation, sexual preference, ethnicity, social status, gender, or age or any of the other categories we as humans have elected to create for ourselves. That is never okay and never acceptable.

What I am saying is just stop complaining so freaking much! Look at your life! I can promise you it's not nearly as bad as you might think it is. Not to mention the fact that the more we "passa mao sobre da cabeca da pessoa" as the Brazilian's say it, or "patting them on the head and saying 'there there'" the more they will feed off of that attention! There are far too many "bleeding martyrs" lately claiming they're offended by so-in-so and saying they're being discriminated against by this and that.

SHUT UP! 

If the term "one nation under God" or "in God we trust" offends you so much, you can leave. As in leave this country. Aint nobody asking you to stay here! Here's the door, don't let it hit you on the way out. Fact is, the country was founded because of religious freedom and it just so happened that all if not most of our Founding Fathers believed in God or a Higher Being. Ugh. Quit your complaining already jeez.

If other things like only have the spaces for "Male" and "Female" on a doctor's medical sheet offend you, or if someone makes a comment on how important families and fathers and mothers are, or how that statue depicts a white man with two Native Americans, or just plain old doesn't agree with your opinion on something, GET OVER YOURSELF. Seriously.

You can and you do choose to by offended by someone or something. That is a fact. It is also your choice to get over it and move on and stop making a lawsuit and law out of everything. If we keep going the path we're going onto now, it'll be illegal to have a men's and women's bathroom! Because that's "sex discrimination."

Please. Just stop before you embarrass yourself.

We are all imperfect people in an imperfect world. Sooner or later someone is going to say or do something that is imperfect. Yes, it's frustrating but I know for a fact you've also done something that's offended someone at some point in time and space in the past or you will do something to offend someone in the future.

To add a bit of humor to this blog post, I've found a few youtube videos I think will illustrate my point even further.

The Most Politically Correct Doll Ever

Political Correctness at College

Forgive the brief language, but the first part is spot on

Night before a Non-denominational Holiday

Prelude: A Thousand Years

I figured I'd better write a blog post about a certain handsome Canadian who has opted to be my husband December 29th of this year :)

Some of you don't know the story of where we began and might think something along the lines of, "Well that was quick."

Honestly it really wasn't. The story of me and Ian began five years ago at BYU-Idaho...

I signed up for my first film seminar class and my first screenwriting class in the winter of 2010. I walked into the film seminar class and was vaguely aware of a cute guy with glasses and perfectly swooped hair. The teacher started his schpeal on movies and began to ridicule Jurassic Park and its ending with the T. Rex who saves the day. Well, I wasn't going to stand for that so I raised my hand and made a snarky comment defending the epicness of Jurassic Park and decided that this teacher was kind of an idiot, so I got up soon after speaking my mind and left the class. I wasn't going to put up with a teacher who had no respect for Jurassic Park and early Speilberg movies! So I snuck out, thinking no one noticed my absence.

Little did I know, that the guy with glasses and perfectly swooped hair did notice me and my absence and had wanted to talk to me after the class ended.

Fast forward a few days later when I walked into the screenwriting class that same week. It was a nighttime class starting around 7:00 and ending at about 9:30 once a week. As I walked in the classroom, I scanned the room for any attractive guys I could sit next too, when my eyes landed on that same adorably boyish guy with glasses and swooped hair. I made my way over to him, sat in the desk right next to him and I think said something like "Is this the screenwriting class?" To which he responded something along the lines of "I hope so."

Since then, our screenwriting teacher, Sister Gilbert, put us in every collaborating group for the rest of the semester. But as luck would have it, every time we tried to plan a critique group session during the week, me and Ian were the only ones who showed up. I had thought that maybe it was on purpose and that Ian was trying to hit on me/ask me out but I was surprised to realize he genuinely wanted to talk about screenwriting and movies. This made me even more interested in him because of how genuine and unassuming he was.

Soon our collaboration group get togethers would be less about movies and scripts and more about life in general; what we liked and didn't like, failed relationships, our aspirations for the future and so on and so forth.

But, obviously, we didn't date right away. Ian was interested in someone and to be honest, I was still pretty young and immature. In spite of us dating other people, for whatever reason, we still remained close friends and we always ended up talking for hours and hours on end, whether it was on the phone or via facebook.

Fast forward to 2013.

my mission farewell in Utah, April 2013

I decided that, through impressions at church and personal prayers, that Heavenly Father wanted me to go on a mission. I told no one I was going other than my mom and my bishop for the longest time. 

The only other person I told was Ian. 

The night I told him that I was going on a mission was the night he told me that he loved me. Needless to say, I was shocked and a little annoyed but he backed up his thought by telling me that the Lord needed me right now. And that I belonged to Heavenly Father for the next 18 months. 

Our friendship deepened more as I drew closer to my return to Georgia before my mission in Brazil and we "dated" in the weeks that followed until then. However I knew that he was a good-looking guy and doubted that he'd "wait" for me for a year and a half. You could maybe call that pessimism but I just call that realism. I wasn't going to get my hopes up on a guy that I'd been in love with for the past three years. Yet in my heart of hearts I always felt drawn to him and he was and still is quite literally my best friend. 

I left on my mission August 21st and for the first four months of my mission I heard sporadically from Ian. I wasn't too bothered by this, mostly because I assumed he was dating other people but I enjoyed when I did get the occasional email from him.

Soon, into my fifth month I started hearing from him more often, and then I would get an email in my inbox every week. I won't share the specifics of the emails and letters here, mostly because they are special but suffices to say that he told me he was waiting for me and that I had all the qualities he wanted in a future wife. 

Still, I was dubious. Not that I doubted him so much as I doubted the many attractive girls who were in Utah and filled his social/family therapy classes. But every email for the next year strengthened my faith that maybe he was serious. Many of my missionary companions were more convinced than I that I would marry him as soon as I got off the plane. 

A few days after I was released as a missionary at the end of February, I had my first phone call from Ian. Even though I was incredibly skittish and strange being a newly returned missionary, he was very patient and understanding as I tried to figure out if he was really who I wanted to date and marry. The only issue was, I was in Georgia without much funds, and he was in Utah finishing up his undergrad. 

From about March to April we essentially dated long distance. As much as I tried convincing myself and him that we needed to date in the same state and date for a while before things got serious, it came to a point where I didn't want to wait anymore. With each FaceTime call it grew harder and harder to not be talking with him and to be so far away from him. 

Finally, I got a job interview for the dream job of mine (the Liahona magazine) and didn't tell Ian I was flying out for it. He just assumed they were phone interviews. With the help of one of my best girl friends, Stacey, I flew in and stayed at her place and she drove me to my interviews. That night, after my interviews were done, Stacey drove me to his house and we waited for him to get home off of his internship. When I saw him rounding the corner to go up the stairs to his apartment I yelled his name and nearly scared the crap out of him. When he realized who I was, I'll never forget the look on his face as long as I live. It was like a man who'd been denied water for days and had finally gotten a waterfall. 

He hugged me and didn't kiss me (though he was worried about making Stacey uncomfortable) and for the next few days we just enjoyed being with each other for the first time in a long time. 

First weekend with Ian after mish

And so after weeks of waiting to see if I got the job, I was finally able to move officially out to Utah, and better yet, be out there for Ian's graduation from BYU!

I was able to meet his wonderful family and we were finally geographically together to date.

Which leads us to now! After a few months of getting to know each other, our quirks, weaknesses, idiosyncrasies, pet peeves, and worst moments we decided to make it official.

He flew out with me to Georgia to meet my family and ask permission from my mom to marry me, and also ask permission to get a certain priceless family heirloom to put on my finger.
The Swan House, Atlanta GA 
It must've went well because he claims he loves my family, even after putting up with all their quirks that I love, and they didn't maul him like they said they would so the week after the Georgia trip, we took my mom/great grandma's ring to get resized and shined up and he proposed Sunday July 12.

And so now we've come full circle! After five years and several set backs, we're getting married in the Payson Utah temple for time and all eternity on December 29th, 2015. Though I have to admit, eloping is sounding better and better by the hour. 

Even though I hate the Twilight franchise and the Twilight movies, the one thing I do like that is related to them is Christina Perri's A Thousand Years song. For the past five years, every conversation I've had with Ian, whether it be on the phone, via facebook or email, that song has always come on the radio or my iPod that's on shuffle. 

Ironically enough, the lyrics fit our story almost perfectly. 

Darling don't be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more 


After years and years of fruitless dates, endless array of tool-bags, and horrible disappointments, I've finally found someone who knows even the darkest and dustiest corners of my soul. Who likes it when I get feisty and fierce about something, who loves everything from The Muppets to Mystery Science Theater to National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation to Horatio Hornblower and everything in between, who wants to write a screenplay together with me, who wants me to publish my book, who wants me to continue playing to violin, who thinks I have a beautiful singing voice, who thinks I'm beautiful even with sparse eyebrows and huge owl glasses, who whispers the sweetest, kindest things to me when we're cuddling watching a movie, who makes me dinner every single night, who isn't offended or put off by my sense of humor or my intense love of books, who will actually encourage me to go in a store if I see something I like and try it on, who wants me to go to Grad school and accomplish all of my dreams, who I can have a deep Gospel discussion with, who wants to travel with me to places I've picked out, who respects me enough to want me to be modest in my swimsuits and skirts, who wants to play video games with me, who is incredibly spiritual and very in tune with the Spirit in every aspect of his life, who understands my love of Harry Potter, who is incredibly quick to forgive and deeply loyal, who loves Beauty and the Beast as much as I do, and so much more!

So this has turned into a novel, but to close up I have to say, I can't wait to marry my best guy friend. I can't wait to be able to fall asleep by his side and wake up to him every morning. Here's to eternity, babe! I get you forever. Muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaa! ;)